Knots and Crosses
There was a time

Lyrics | Credits | Video

Release Date: 1999


Knots and Crosses began in the fall of 1986 with three conservatory-trained musicians struggling to discover or reclaim their musical identities both individually and collectively. Rick’s love of blues rock and the Rolling Stones, my infatuation with the Beatles and all things pop, and Carol’s immersion in folk music, particularly the death-obsessed ballads of the British Isles. In the early stages of our attempts to find a common ground, we were treated to a life-altering performance by Richard Thompson’s band during the Daring Adventures tour. By the time he had finished “Calvary Cross,” we had a blueprint laid out before us of just what could be done with a folk song, electric guitar, and wonderfully loud drums. During the course of our career, we would explore other musical styles, but we never found ourselves far from the territory that Mr. Thompason had staked out, and our cover of “Walking on a Wire” would appear in nearly every live show we did.

The early years were spent struggling to define our sound and find an audience. We made an endless series of demos, which garnered us sporadic airplay on Boston rock radio stations and tiny nibbles of interest from record companies. Simultaneously, we were working our way through the weeknight schedules at T.T. the Bears, but we never really made sense to the crowd of rabid moshers or tattooed cool.

After spending much too much money on demo tapes, we began recording new material on a little eight track that I had. We recorded drums and bass for six songs in one afternoon, calling the session a few songs short because we didn’t the twenty-five bucks for the next hour. Included in this group was a song built around a riff that Rick had brought to the previous day’s rehearsal. Having only a handful of lyrics, we arranged the song with the tape rolling, while Carol formulated a chorus with each successive take. After completing overdubs, it became apparent that our little demo was turning out rather well, and that the unfinished song, now completed, seemed to have a life of its own. Since nobody else was interested, we put the CD out on our own. The title song, “Creatures of Habit,” became a massive, left-field success on Boston triple-A radio, and before we knew it, we were assembling CDs in our living room as fast as we could. Our naiveté had a certain charm, and the honesty of the music came through the low budget technology. After years of trying too hard to fit the norm, our audience had found us.

We sold a fair number of records and concert tickets, but despite the best efforts of our lawyer, not a single record company could be convinced of our potential worth. Not knowing where to turn, we embarked on a second self-made recording. This time we were a bit less naïve, a bit more calculated. To complicate matters further (much further), the marriage between Carol and myself had disintegrated a month before the first sessions. The winter air was tense (and chilled) in the shed in my backyard as we recorded our vocals with faithful engineer Coleman Rogers (God love him). The Fleetwood Mac comparisons were obvious and annoying, and the difficult second album Curve of the Earth came out that spring. This time flirtations with several record companies finally led to signing with Island Records in the fall. A truly bizarre set of recording sessions in the South, and the inevitable corporate restructuring found us dropped by the label, before any serious work on a third album had begun.

Exhausted and at a total loss, the band decided to call it quits. Some people have since told me that we were ahead of our time, that we were behind the times, that we were in the wrong place at the right time (and vice versa), but it was clear to us that we were simply out of time. But times change, and several years later we were back in a rehearsal room working up two unrecorded songs from our past. After fifteen minutes, we were transported back to a simpler, warmer, happier time. A time that in reality never was, but in some ways felt as if it always was.

There was a time.

Alan Williams

May ‘99

Lyrics

There was a time

  • What’s done is done
    All that’s left are apparitions
    I’m only living on
    Poison, fear, and superstition

    Why do you weep?
    The oceans part for you not me
    I’m in too deep
    To rest in peace

    Well, I took the past
    Laid it all to rest
    With our buried memories
    But the sun goes down
    And you come around
    To haunt me in my dreams

    What’s gone is gone
    All that’s left are faint illusions
    What have I become
    Captured by theses strange delusions

    You made an art
    Of driving stakes right through my heart
    The nightmares start
    And never cease

    Well, I took the past…

    Why is it time isn’t
    Time enough
    Why is it high isn’t
    High enough to chase you away

    Well, I took the past…

  • I used to think that love was only
    For just the very lucky few
    I used to settle for the ones who
    Believed in that way too

    I’ve been waiting for you for so long

    There was a time when I would waken
    And lie with my eyes open wide
    And I would dream of strong arms holding me
    And I would start to cry

    I’ve been waiting for you for so long

    I know time can only be my friend
    I know, maybe this time ‘til the end
    I feel closer than I’ll ever be
    I feel that when you’re lying next to me

    I’ve been waiting for you for so long

  • One night, no warning
    And you walked away
    No light, came morning
    Do you like it that way?

    I’ll wait, but you won’t
    Pull at my sleeve
    When I close my eyes
    You’re all that I see

    I want to hold you
    But I know you won’t be there
    I reach out my empty hands
    But all I touch is air

    I’m only gonna say it once
    I love you more than I can bear
    You tear my soul apart
    With your cold heart

    What good are reasons
    That we don’t believe
    I know this world is
    Now what it seems

    I want to hold you…

  • I have tried
    To believe in something
    I don’t know why
    I find it so hard

    Cause what I’ve lost
    Was good for nothing
    And what I’ve kept
    Won’t go very far

    So I wait for one
    Moment of mercy
    And I know you’ve been
    Waiting too
    When I reach that
    Moment of mercy
    I’ll try to save some
    Mercy for you

    There’s a time
    To seek deliverance
    And there’s a line
    For walking alone

    In my heart
    I seek forgiveness
    For the places
    That I’ve called my home

    So I wait for one
    Moment of mercy…

  • What’s left of my resistance
    I can feel it fading away
    Heartbeats so inconsistent
    One false move and they put you away

    So let the others adore you
    I don’t need you now
    I don’t need you now
    Just when I thought it was over
    Once again you send me out of control

    I’m lost and I am wasted
    I’m so alone and I don’t know why
    Some nights, I just can’t face it
    When I see that look in your eye

    So let the others adore you…

    You know I try so hard
    To stay away from you
    You know I try so hard
    So I’ll just get in line
    Among the walking wounded
    It’s a crime when you
    Can’t find your way home

    So let the others adore you…

  • You don’t cope at all
    You turn your mirror
    To face the wall

    You say that things have changed
    But nothing’s different
    Just rearranged

    There was a time
    When you did everything alone
    And you were happier
    When you were on your own

    So why are you on your knees?
    You need more than prayer
    If you can not breathe
    Then come up for air

    And you don’t leave your room
    You tell yourself again and again
    It’s much too soon

    You say your walls look bare
    But you can’t blame him
    For what’s not there

    There was a time
    Your hollow face seemed so alive
    There was a fire in your heart
    Fire in your eyes

    So why are you on your knees…

  • Maybe we shared a cigarette
    But my name she won’t remember

    I remember Annetta’s face
    As she built another bookcase
    She would build a hundred more
    Without farewells
    She walked right out the door
    Alone

    I can’t say we were friends
    She’d just say I was a man

    But I remember the way she tried
    So hard to keep her heart inside
    More than anyone, she knew
    That in this world the beautiful
    Is cruel

    For one that never had the chance
    To rise above the circumstance
    Of a lonely carpentress
    Come on Annetta, please put on that dress

    If you’re looking for something
    Look behind Annetta’s bookcase

    Maybe you will find it there
    With the love she never shared
    I remember the shoes she wore
    Kicking sawdust all around
    The floor

  • Traditional

  • What did I tell you?
    Don’t bite the hand the feeds you
    What did I tell you?
    You can’t change the rules to please you

    What did I tell you?
    Don’t drop your glass just when it’s full
    What did I tell you?
    Now you look just like a fool

    You don’t even know what you’ve done
    There’s no place to run

    There’s a dark cloud over your
    Hanging head tonight

    What is inside you?
    That makes you scream out what you say

    What is inside you?
    That makes you hate the human race?

    What is inside me?
    That makes me hate the things you do
    What is inside me?
    That makes me feel so bad for you

    There’s a dark cloud over your
    Hanging head tonight

  • You’ve turned some heads
    The heads of fools that are better off dead
    And you broke some hearts
    With the skill of a snake in the dark

    And I saw you there
    With your rings
    And that crap in your hair
    With eyes of ice
    And smile of concrete
    Picking up diamonds
    That fall at your feet

    Never take as fact
    The lies of lovers caught in the act
    Never lift up your heel
    From the spines of the wretched
    The beg for meal

    And I saw you there…

    And I’m falling for you

    And I saw you there…

  • He said he would love her
    For better of worse
    It wasn’t the first time
    That he’d said those words

    But her love was deeper
    And her love was blind
    And now she’s alone
    For the very first time

    But what could I tell her
    That she was well rid of him
    She wouldn’t listen
    She only wanted him back again

    She said
    Steadfast my lonely heart
    You haven’t failed me yet
    Dreams pass and fall apart
    And you still want him back

    You know he was no good
    You know he was wrong
    You know that your mending
    Has taken too long

    But don’t let him break you
    Don’t let him win
    Don’t let him keep you
    From beginning again

    But what could I tell her…

  • Too tired to think straight and too numb to speak
    The dry-eyed tear stain on a frozen cheek

    The empty gestures of a dull routine
    The blank expression of a silent scream
    Only the lonely can hear

    But in my dreams I leave it behind
    The sweet release of learning to fly

    I can even see the curve of the earth
    Where the heavens open wide
    If you need to leave the weight of the world
    You’ve got to close your eyes
    To see the curve of the earth

    Every minute, every waking hour
    Every wind chill, every sudden shower

    What kept me breathing starts to make me drown
    What held me up now only holds me down
    And I’m bound by a weight that chains me
    As the waters rise

    But in my dreams the waters will part
    The sunlight beamed right through my heart

    I can even see the curve of the earth

    But in my dreams I’m already there
    My heavy heart is lighter than air
    These tired arms are yearning to fly
    To leave the ground and touch the sky

    I can even see the curve of the earth…

  • “Save your breath, I’ve made up my mind”
    As she turned, I heard the engine whine
    Can there be anything that I can say
    What would make you go so far away?

    “I’m not scared, He’ll take care of me”
    But I could see her uncertainty
    Can there be anything that I can say
    What would make you go so far away?

    Don’t you go on that train tonight

    “When I go, I won’t look back”
    There she stood with her bags all packed
    Can there be anything that I can say
    What would make you go so far away?

    Don’t you go on that train tonight

  • Richard Thompson
    Songs of Polygram International, Inc. BMI

 

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Credits & Thanks

Knots and Crosses are –
Carol Noonan – Vocals, acoustic guitar
Alan Williams – Vocals, keyboard, guitars
Rick Harris – Guitars
with
Greg Porter – Bass
Ben Wittman – Drums
Brock Avery – Drums on Walking on a Wire & The Train Song
Chris Moore – Mandolin on Concrete Smile
Produced by Alan Williams

Apparitions, Waiting for You
Recorded April 10 & 11, 1999 at Woolly Mammoth Sound, Boston MA
Engineered by Sir David James Minehan
Mixed Apr.–May 1999 at Lanaland, Bolton, MA by Alan Williams
© & ℗ 1999 Crossongs Records

Come Up For Air, Concrete Smile, Creatures of Habit, Moment of Mercy
Basics recorded Sept. 17 1990 at New Alliance Boston MA
Engineered by Andrew Murdoch

The Train Song, Walking On a Wire
Basics recorded Jan. 4 1991, at Open Road Studio, Portland, ME.
Engineered by Alan Williams
Overdubs recorded Oct. 1990–Feb. 1991 at Open Road Studio
Engineered by Alan Williams
Originally mixed Mar. 11–14 at Wellspring Sound, Newton, MA (now in West Concord, MA)
Engineered by Coleman Rogers
Remixed April–May, 1999 at Lanaland, Bolton MA by Alan Williams
© & ℗ 1991 Crossongs Records

Adore, Annetta’s Bookcase, Curve of the Earth, Dark Cloud, How Can I Live at the Top of a Mountain, Steadfast
Basics recorded Jan 4.–11 1993 at Big Sound, Westbook, ME
Engineered by Coleman Rogers
Overdubs recorded Jan.–Feb 1993 at The Shed, Peaks Island, ME
Engineered by Coleman Rogers and Alan Williams
Originally mixed Mar. 1993 at Studio Dual, Cape Elizabeth, ME.
Engineered by Coleman Rogers
Remixed April–May, 1999 at Lanaland, Bolton MA by Alan Williams
© & ℗ 1993 Crossongs Records

Mastered by Henk Kooistra at 9West Mastering, Marlborough MA

Thanks to Amy Ray, Tonee Harbert, Peter & Kathy Lehndorff, Jim Olsen and everyone at Signature Sounds, David Minehan, Coleman Rogers, Ellen Giurleo, Kevin Gary, Mark Sewell, Kris Colucci, Mark Fischer, Chad Gilley, Jim Herron, Adam Klein, Bonnie and Jean at T.T.s, Eric Kilburn, David and Kay Ray, Billy Kleinfeld, Giles McNamee, Jeanine LaRoche, Jim Pinfold, Burt Kleinfeld, Paul Leonard, Meghan Casey, Chuck Parker, Melissa, Hall, Rolf Ordahl, Steve Nilan, Jim Mouradian, Roy Goode, Joe Brien, Paul French, John Etnier, Todd Thibaud, Cambridge Music, Buckdancer’s Choice, Amadeus Music, The Harris Bennett, Noonan, Dugan, Eaton, Gilligan, Anderson, and Wlliams families.

Special thanks to Abbie Callanan, Jeff Flagg, and Darleen Wilson.

Extra special thanks to Greg, Ben, Brock, and Chris, and all he musicians who ever sat in or bailed us out.

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